Laura Swisher: Condor Tamer

By Mike "Microphone" Landry


Going to Burning Man is a lot like hunting for ice cream in an igloo. Except that the igloo is more like a three-story duplex and the ice cream is more like a hungry meercat scavenging for socks in the laundry.

To put it bluntly -- it was insane, erotic, fun, moist, hungry, sleepy, dopey, salty, and bizarre. I'm fortunate enough to work with Laura Swisher, and she did a lot of wacky things off-camera.

Did you know she has a real huge talent for taming condors? One afternoon after filming we all decided to hang out with some Native Americans in their bus for a nice game of dominoes. Laura showed those Indians what was up when they bet her she couldn't ride their entire flock of condors. I've never seen a co-host punch an elderly medicine man like that before. But if I keep working with "The Swish," I'm sure it won't be the last time.

Mike Landry is a Liar and a Drunk

By Laura "The Swish" Swisher


"Hunting for ice cream in an igloo"? "A hungry meercat scavenging for socks in the laundry"? I don't know about Condors but it seems Landry had a little run in with some "Wild Turkey."

I have no recollection of playing dominoes with Native Americans -- isn't that a scene out of an Oliver Stone movie? -- or tossing back their candy. But I do remember the bizarre, moist part -- especially the moist part. I'm referring, of course, to my armpits. Man it was hot out there!

There were also topless women on bicycles, balls of flame shooting into the night sky, fire twirlers, desert whales, naked joggers, dreadlocks, bad-idea theater, a vagina wall of fame, gladiator-style fights, male cheerleaders wearing only fig leaves and sneakers, art cars, art bikes, art golf carts, trapeze artists, parachutists, and really good coffee. I could go on and on and on and on.

You had to be there. Take a look at these clips to see what you missed.





Party on the Playa
Even if you're not into nudity and light sticks, there are other ways to pass the time.









Getting Around Burning Man
It's hot as hell in the desert. Take a look at some of the innovative ways people get from place to place.









Coming Down
Who says self-debauchery is a bad thing?

Editor's Note: This story was ammended to remove drug references from an earlier version at Burning Man's request. Burning Man is understandably concerned about any association of their event with drug use.